A LOVELY BREW
Venue - St Mellion, Cornwall
Winner - Tim Brewster (+20)
Runner-up - Ed Bell (+22)
Hound - Matt Johnson (+54)
​
In the most notorious Jacket to date, the devilish Nicklaus course and its benign sister, the Kernow, acted out a depraved kind of good cop bad cop scenario upon the innocent players of the WCGT.
The entire field endured a torrid tournament of record breaking proportions, with the warped and brutal savagery of the golfing test producing the highest ever winning score and the highest ever Hound score amongst a veritable smorgasbord of other 'worst ever' feats. Most notably, Nick Bell and Matt Johnson contrived to card a heartbreaking all-time record 24 blobs a piece during a titanic battle for (to avoid) the Hound. Now one of tour's leading players a mere 3 years since his debut, Brook McLaughlin played beautifully on the evil Nicklaus layout to assume the first round lead at +5, despite a horror finish at 18 where he hooked a 3-iron into the hotel adjoining the course and came close to hospitalising some of the resort guests.
Defending champion Harry Gray slumped to a first round of +15, clearly drained after a whirlwind year of media commitments, during which rumours surfaced of a film screenplay being adapted to tell the story of his Bridesmaid Curse in the mould of a Tin Cup style heroic vanquishing of demons. In round 2 on a more forgiving Kernow layout Tim Brewster produced the move of 'Moving Morning' with a 3-under-par round to claim the 36 hole lead at +9, two shots clear of McLaughlin whose wild driving was thankfully saved by sublime short game to keep him firmly in the mix.
Debutant Rich Gange of the Gange Brothers also had a fruitful Moving Morning to move into the final group, with the excellent debutant Tom Wigglesworth rounding out the final foursome. The final round on the Nicklaus course, with toughened pin positions, was nothing short of a bloodbath, with no player coming close to par and the average score for the field hitting a record nadir of 14.7 over par.
During the final round the lead changed hands numerous times with players making mistakes left, right and centre and throwing blobs around like confetti as they bled out all over the golf course. Ed Bell defied the beastliness of the examination to card a creditable +8 round and move through a collapsing field to set the clubhouse target at +22.
Wigglesworth, McLaughlin and Brewster entered the final stretch with only a few shots separating them as they raced towards the clubhouse in the hope of avoiding complete exsanguination before the finale. In the end it was a doughty Brewster who played the best worst golf to plod his way down the safe side of the 18th hole, avoiding death in the water guarding the green, to claim The Jacket by 2 shots from Bell, who claimed a second Salver in 3 years. It was a superb ending to the weekend for the likeable pseudo-Cornishman from the West Midlands, who overcame the self-committed decapitation murder of his beloved Callaway Big Bertha driver during round 1 to deliver a maiden Major title for his loyal fans.
